It was “Date Night” for my best friend Stephanie and I and we’d already enjoyed a light dinner of tofu and veggies in black bean sauce at a Thai restaurant and flavored lattes at a local cafe. We wanted to do something else fun. Steph said sure, let’s wander into the shop.
That’s how we generally roll when we’re together, playing it by ear, improvising our time together, doing whatever seems to be the most fun in the moment. To us, this is the happiest way to live.
We ducked into the little shop which was at basement level, down a little flight of stairs. It smelled musky and delicious inside, fragrant incense wafting through the air.
The little shop sold incense, tapestries, spiritual games and card decks, glass bongs. We were just poking around when Steph spotted a Ouija board.
She was so excited, and begged the cashier, a handsome young man with cafe au lait skin and an afro, to let us use it. I’d never used a Ouija board before.
Communing With The Spirits
Tony, the sweet young cashier, let us open us the board and play with it. Better yet, he joined us, sitting cross-legged on the floor of the store with us, so we could all “commune with the spirits” and see if any messages arrived for us.
If you’ve never used a Ouija board, it’s a wild experience! You place a star-shaped “planchette” in the center of the board and then ask it questions. Spirits from the beyond are supposed to answer you, and when you rest your fingers lightly on the planchette, it will move towards a letter of the alphabet on the board, or a number, or a word.
It is definitely a little bit “out there,” yet I’d always wanted to try one, and I believe that people still exist as spirit and energy after they pass on from the earth. So we all thought, what the heck!
We asked the board if it had a message for us, and the planchette moved toward “Yes.” We asked it what the message was, and it spelled out, “L-O-V-E-L-I-F-E.”
Love life! What a lovely message. It was one I needed to hear because I’d been caught again in a down mood for a few days, still feeling sad about a relationship that ended. I was finding it challenging to stay in my “happy place.”
My best friend reminded me that what really matters is living the now, and loving every moment ~ tips I have shared here on 8womendream, and something I do try to live daily. But I’m human, and sometimes I’m sad, and I’d been worrying about ever finding happiness in a romantic relationship again.
The mind loves to find things to worry about, and will find things that are “wrong” in our lives whether we are in wonderful relationships, or single, or not sure what our relationship status is! Steph was so right.
I needed to get out there in the world, and have fun and be happy, and know that that was how I would inevitably attract someone wonderful again anyhow ~ by being happy, and being me.
By loving life!
Any More Messages?
We kept playing with the Ouija board for a while. We asked who was speaking to us, and the board spelled out “E-R-I-C” who was a beloved friend of mine who died years ago. Well, that was definitely an Eric kind of message; I knew and felt while he was alive and after he was gone that he wanted me, and all the people he loved, to be happy.
We asked for more messages. He said “I love you,” and “Keep a smile,” and “Make Time…” And then someone walked into the shop and we stopped, and we never caught the end of the “make time” message. I’m guessing it could have been make time count, or make time for happiness, or make time for love.
Whatever the final message was, the overall theme was clearly to be happy and enjoy life, now. It was just what I needed to hear!
I am always reminding my life-coaching clients, friends and family to write a happy story for their lives. The stories we tell about ourselves, past, present and future, are so powerful. Our words shape our reality, help create what is to come, and actually create emotional states within us.
Tell A Better Story About Your Life!
Think about it. If you tell a story about how disastrous your life and past is, how do you feel? If you instead tell a story about how blessed you are you, how you have always done your best and how life is unfolding as it should, with beautiful lessons learned, how does that feel?
Any one of us can tell our own life story as if we are the most unfortunate person on the planet, and find evidence for that, since no human life is without some sorrow, disappointment, or loss. And, each one of us can also tell the story of our lives as if we are the luckiest person on the planet, and find evidence to justify that, since there are some blessings in every life.
I teach this in my workshops on “Creating Your Happiest Year Yet.” I have participants practice telling their stories to each other as “the worst horror story ever,” and then as if they are “the luckiest person in the world.” Everyone can tell the story both ways!
And let’s face it, it’s much more fun to look back at your life when you’re able to see the best in your past and in yourself, when you are willing to learn from the mistakes of the past, and to find inspiration from what you’ve learned to help propel you into an even happier future.
The stories we tell about our present lives help either move us forward or keep us stuck where we are, when we are unhappy and resisting being here now. As the expression goes, “What you resist, persists.”
Negative energy about the present moment can keep us stuck where we are, versus being in gratitude for what we have now, which can help us to move forward, leaving us more open to take inspired action to create an even better future.
Create A Happy Future!
The stories we tell about who we are becoming, and what is possible for us, also help to determine how our future will unfold. Henry Ford wrote, “Whether you think that you can, or that you can’t, you’re usually right.” If you are convinced that you can live your dreams and create something beautiful in your life, you will find a way to do it. If you are convinced that you can’t, you won’t.
I say, why not write a happy story for your life, past, present and future, and then just go ahead and live it?
Easier said than done sometimes of course, as I remembered myself this past week… after all, I teach this to others and still need reminders to live it sometimes! I have my moments when the stories I tell myself or others about my past or future are not as inspired and empowering as they could be.
The key, I think, is to be aware of this, and to shift to a happier story when we catch ourselves acting like victims of the world, or talking in ways that put limits on the possibilities for our futures.
These are actually fun exercises to do; try them to see if you can write a happier story for your life!
1. First, play the game with a friend where you both tell your story as the “Worst Horror Story Ever!” and then about how you are “The Luckiest Person In The World.” Everyone I’ve played this game with can find evidence to support both perspectives.
2. Then, pick a story from your past that has always troubled you, and see if you can write a happier story about it. Can you find the blessing in disguise in a painful situation from your past? Can you see how it led you to something beautiful in your current life? See if you can find something to love in whatever feels most challenging.
3. Now, practice telling a beautiful story about your life now, by focusing on what you are most grateful for in your life. Count your blessings, and take stock of all the good that you have.
4. Finally, write a happy story for your future by dreaming big and jotting down a vision for your “ideal life,” as if it is already happening… See it, taste it, feel it, know that it is coming true, and let the vision of your most beautiful future come to you!
Now, go take some inspired action steps to live it! I’m feeling happy again myself, and that’s what I’m doing… Here’s to living our dreams, all of us! Let us know how you are doing on yours.