5 Simple Ways to Be a Fun Fearless Female

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Lisa is a freelance writer, consultant and life coach. She has her BA in English and Creative Writing from Princeton and her MPA from Harvard. Lisa recently finished the first draft of her book manuscript, Burning Down the House. Her dream is to publish this first book and teach the world how to discover their hidden joy. Her post day is Tuesday.
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fun fearless female

Yesterday, I jumped out of an airplane at 9,000 feet up, above the clouds.

If that doesn’t make a girl feel like a fun, fearless female, what does?!?

Above the Clouds 

I picked a crisp and sunny fall day for my jump at Saratoga Skydive in upstate New York.

I couldn’t quite believe what I was about to do, but it was on my “bucket list” and I was ready to make some major quantum leaps in my life! What better way to signify it than to literally leap out of a plane into open space?

Now, I’ll admit that I was nervous while I was on the ground, signing waivers, learning how to arch my back when I jump, getting strapped into a harness. Was I really about to jump out of a perfectly good airplane?!?

The small propeller plane used for the jumps only accommodates one tandem diving instructor and student per flight, so I waited on the ground and did some last minute meditations and prayers while my friend Ray jumped.

He was exhilarated when he landed and gave me a few tips to make the experience more fun. Feeling reassured that he was alive and well and that he had enjoyed the experience, I took some deep breaths, and up I went!

Amazing and Surreal! 

There we were, my tandem instructor Jim and me, heading up to 9,000 feet, in the tiny plane cabin. There were no seats, so we sat on the floor, me tucked in-between Jim’s legs with my legs stretched out in front of me, with Jim leaning back into the cockpit, next to our pilot, Bob.

We flew around for about 15 minutes, gazing out over the Hudson River, the green fields and farms, the tree tops already decked out in their  glorious red and golden autumn foliage. Surprisingly, shockingly in fact for me, I truly wasn’t nervous once we were up in the air.

I thought I’d be terrified. Yet I’d surrendered the whole experience to my higher power earlier, figuring that once you jump out it’s in God’s hands anyway! No going back.

The anxiety I’d been feeling while on the ground evaporated, and a sense of calm and peace washed over me while I took in the awesome beauty below and all around us.

Ready, Set, Jump! 

When it came time for Jim to hook his harness to mine, I had to sit in his lap. He clipped me in and tightened the harness straps around my thighs and waist.

Then it was time to put the goggles on, and gloves, so my hands would be warm. It’s cold up there above the clouds!

Finally, he opened the plane door. I’d decided to close my eyes right at the moment of the jump because I didn’t honestly want to see the ground far beneath me at that moment.

First, I had to swing my legs out of the plane, resting my feet on a metal step just outside the door. The wind was rushing into the plane.

fun fearless female number two


Eyes closed, I waited for the second or two it took for Jim to hurl us out of the plane… and off we went! I opened my eyes once we were free-falling…

Astonishing! There we were, 9,000 feet up, free-falling through the clouds, wind rushing at us, reaching speeds of up to 120 mph according to Jim, until the parachute opened.

It’s an intense sensation in free fall, for sure, yet not nearly as scary as I thought it would be. It’s more like floating with a chilly high-speed and high- force wind whipping your hair back; it doesn’t actually feel like “falling.”

The key is to breathe deeply and relax as much as is possible 9,000 feet in the air, and to arch your back. I stretched my arms out and there I was, flying, like Supergirl!

Then, the parachute opened, and I was just floating over the earth, admiring the geometric patterns, the rectangles, squares, wavy lines, the green and brown and gold and orange, of the farms and golf course, the houses and roads, the fall foliage.

Floating, high above it all, blissful, surprisingly relaxed, sitting back in the harness. What a wondrous and beautiful world it is!

I’m amazed by all of it: our magical Planet Earth, the fact that one can safely jump out of a plane a few miles up in the sky, the fact that airplanes exist at all and that we can fly around the world, travel anywhere in just a matter of hours.

Isn’t it all a giant miracle?

Flying High!

This jump for me symbolized what I wrote about last week: making LEAPS sometimes to propel ourselves into the next, amazing phase of our lives. Recreating ourselves in the greatest, grandest version of ourselves, all the time.

Sometimes life is simply about putting one foot in front of the other, doing what needs to be done in the moment, marching forward. Yet sometimes it’s simply time to leap!

I really believe that when we want to live big dreams, the biggest key to achieving them is simply believing that we can, and a big part of that is being able to walk through the fears we may experience, or jump over the obstacles in our path.

I love this quote by Orison Swett Marden: “Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle.”

I’ve never taken a bigger leap (or risk!) than jumping out of an airplane, that’s for sure!

Putting It All on the Line

Great achievements involve great risk. We cannot do “great things” in our lives without being willing to leap forward and to shift ourselves into a new state of consciousness. To expand and be more than we were before.

I have taken big risks before. I have always been adventurous.

I’ve traveled in foreign countries, in the Middle East and Mediterranean Europe, by myself. I’ve navigated my way on my own in Russia, in Cuba, in Spain, in Turkey, speaking the languages (at least the conversational phrases I learned for the trips!), shopping and blending in as much as I can with the locals, following the customs.

Immersing ourselves in another culture and language can be challenging and requires a leap of faith.

So do many things in life – the start of a new romantic relationships, embarking on a new career path… I am using this LEAP to remind myself as well that I truly can do anything.

If I’ve risked my life then what could scare me more than that? I was calm and want to remember that so when fears arise for me I can just remind myself: I am powerful and strong, and can handle whatever comes my way.

Certainly I can! I jumped out of a plane yesterday!

Fun Fearless Females!

When I first applied to be a blogger on 8womendream, the ad that I responded to was seeking a “fun, fearless female” who was working on writing her first book.

My gosh, I thought, they’re looking for ME! I applied immediately with “Fun, Fearless Female Writer” in the subject line. I aim to be one of these every day – some days I accomplish it more successfully than others!

And yesterday was a great day!

Trying It On for Size!

How does one practice being a fun, fearless female? Here are 5 ways:

1. Pick something that scares you and is on your “bucket list”
(and if you don’t have a bucket list of things you want to do before you die, make one now!).

2. Fully commit to doing it!
Preferably commit publicly, and invite a friend to either join you or support you in doing it. Creating expectations and/or accountability can help if you start wanting to back out of it! I went skydiving with my good friend, Ray, and it helped me tremendously! We’d committed to each other that we would go together, so we were counting on each other.

3. Schedule it and make a plan!
When something is simply an idea, it can get crowded out with the busy pace of lives. Once it’s actually on the calendar, we’re more likely to make the time and keep the commitment!

4. Prepare yourself emotionally and mentally by envisioning yourself having fun in the midst of that activity.
I pictured myself floating in the air and loving it, and held that vision of having it be fun. And, it was!

5. When the time comes, go for it with gusto!
Once you are in the plane, in my case, or on the white water raft, or the rollercoaster, or whatever else it is that you choose, there’s no going back! At that point, we have two choices: either to participate and be afraid, or to breathe deeply, relax as much as possible, and commit to enjoying the moments fully! At the very least, experiences like this can be exhilarating and a reminder of how courageous we are, even if not every second of it is enjoyable. It’s still a milestone on your journey!

Of course, when you’re done, celebrate yourself! Toast yourself with a friend, treat yourself to something relaxing (a massage or bubble bath or whatever feels good to you!).

In the end what matters most really is not whether we have fears (we all do when tackling something exciting, bold or new!) but how we conquer them.

I”m proud of myself that I did it, and will remind myself every day that I can do anything – with God all things are possible!

I’ve leave you with some lyrics from a favorite song (Fame), which played on Pandora’s shuffle setting when I got home from the jump today:

I can catch the moon in my hands… I’m gonna learn how to fly – high…

I’m gonna make it to Heaven… Light up the sky like flame…

Baby remember my name… 


  • Wow, you are so amazing!  Congratulations on seeing this through.  I used to think I’d skydive, but not anymore, but maybe because I became a mom to Brian and I became cautious about some things.   Love to see the photos… great post!

  • Supergirl! Yeah! Wow, I definitely want to do a skydive sometime. I’m used to putting my body in potentially dangerous situations when I rock climb but this is a whole other level of fear control :)

  • Rem

    My son has informed me that he wants to jump out of plane on his 18th birthday, his “bucket list” item.  Although I am freaked out, I admire his value in setting goals like this so early in his life!  You are both crazy but I admire you.  Please show us the photos or a video if they made one…would LOVE to see that.  xo you go girl Rem

  • Jayne Speich

    Are you CRAZY, girl? hee hee. I could never in a million years do that. But it does get me to think about how instinctive and animal fear is. It’s not rational, and there’s really nothing you can do about it, except face it! I mean, there you are 9000 feet off the ground, and tethered to a guy who is going to jump out of the plane and pull you along with him. What are you going to do, except face it and go with it?

    I’ll never feel quite the same way getting on a plane again after reading this….


  • You jumped out of a perfectly good airplane :) What am amazing time – nothing like flying to confirm you can accomplish anything on the ground. Congrats on your adventure Lisa!