Do You Feel Like A Dream Loser?

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Heather’s dream is to share with the world her success at becoming healthy after age 40. Heather lost over 88 pounds through changing her diet and incorporating exercise into her busy life. She would like to take what she has learned about becoming fit after 40, and using her Metabolic Training Certification to help others struggling with weight issues mid-life. Heather’s post day is Monday.
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Taking an entrepreneurial dream break is good – as long as its not too long. Have you ever noticed that when you stop doing something how long it takes to get back on track to doing it? I know this has applied to my life when it comes to working out, filing, and all those fun little things we need to do on a daily basis to keep life and health in order.

Do you notice any of these causing you to be a dream loser?

  • Feel lethargic or everything seems like a chore?
  • Typically late for appointments or forget important papers for the meetings?
  • Your schedule doesn’t allow you to actually get anything done
  • Can’t concentrate or focus?

Sign me up for all of the above at different points in my life. Getting sidetracked is human nature and entrepreneurial ADD is a very common problem. At least that’s what I’m blaming it on recently.

It is very easy to fall into the trap of beating yourself up for losing ground on your dream. Its not something you can pass off to anyone else for not getting done, right? If you really want it, you’ll work on it. Which is a perfectly acceptable and reasonable response when you aren’t caught up in one of the dream loser issues so conveniently listed above.

I’ve had several opportunities to feel like a loser while pursuing my dreams. Some of the more recent drawbacks have been health related, and just lacking the energy to do even the most basic life events, never mind the mounting extras that a dream can entail. What amazes me is the ability to continue to beat myself up, regardless of the situation.

What personal trait makes you feel like a dream loser?

  • Suffering from procrastination
  • Feeling like a couch potato
  • Stuck between two paths
  • Just can’t make a decision
  • Getting feedback from negative people
  • Laziness in general
  • Letting your previous failures get in the way
  • Still looking for your life’s purpose

Looking at that list, I can definitely relate to most, but I’ve noticed a pattern. There’s always a combination of those items listed that usually kicks my dream momentum into neutral.

So what do you do when you find your dream on the back burner?

Time to take a deep breath, give yourself a break and change something to get back on track.

What traits are keeping you from your next dream accomplishment?


Heather’s dream is to have multiple streams of income, starting with launching an e-commerce website that showcases her couture jewelry, which are crafted by her. You can find Heather online at For Your Adornment and Twitter And Beyond Dot Com. She also teaches Social Media tactics for business, besides being CEO of her own web design company. Heather’s post day is Friday.

  • Excellent blog! I am in the same place in my life and I am lost. Thank you! This made me feel better. I’ve been at my dream for such a long time and I was feeling discouraged. It’s good to know there are others like me. Thank you!

  • Nadine

    I feel a lot like Heather in her article. My design dream has been going on and of for 11 years now, starting just before I split up with my ex-husband in June 2000. I agree with Rayne that fear of success has a lot to do with it. But the reason why you have this fear of success is also important. And that is something I am finally starting to understand. My ex-husband crushed all my dreams to start with. I started up the design project anyway, but it was very hard with two young kids and limited funds, no income apart from child support. So I gave up to get a “real” job. But the dream kept coming back over the years. What amazed me, and still does, is how my friends have always supported me, believed in me. I have given two very succesful speeches on my project to the American Women’s Club in Brussels and Antwerp. That was so much fun! I had a stand at Maison & Objet in Paris, one of the biggest home deco tradeshows in the world, and did many Xmas markets in Belgium. After a huge burn-out from doing so many short term contracts as a Management Assistant, and the feeling I wasn’t getting anywhere, I took up my dream again. And started studying Interior Architecture in September 2008. But i suffered a massive deep vein thrombosis only weeks after the course started, and I was hospitalized and then on sick leave till the end of the year 2008. It’s been a rocky road since trying to figure out how to realize my dream. Only recently, after 2.5 years of unemployment, something else hit me: toxic family! I realise now to what extent they have influenced my dreams. My sisters’ holier than thou attitude (I have never been unemployed a day in my life) and worse comments hit hard. And while today I still get emails from friends all over the world how they admire me and encourage me in continuing my design work, because they believe in me, my parents nor sisters have never supported me nor encouraged me. On the contrary, they have always said it was a silly idea, I would never succeed, get a real job! I think I can finally break free from them. One of my favourite quotes is: “If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.” – Henry David Thoreau
    Thanks to my friends for believing in me!

  • Remy Gervais, Top Photographer

    business check up and health check up – hand in hand. And here is what I notice i do…have so many things going at once, I cant make a decision on any of them. So they are all in front of me all of the time, in process. The worst place for me to be. I hate that. So I am going to commit to just doing one thing on each project today, and see if that makes a difference! xox Hang in there sweetie!!! xox Rem

  • Rayne

    I always blame fear of success in a weird way. It seems like a lot of other stuff, but for the BIG dreams – it’s almost always fear of actually doing it. One thing that works for me. Make a date to come back. Take two days, three days, no more than a week and do NOTHING on that topic. Hide the folders, the books, the notes. Go cold turkey, knowing that you have an standing invitation to come back to it. Then start again. I find this permission slip makes me miss my dream. And the short time period is usually much shorter than I can slow roll myself doing dribs and drabs and accomplishing nothing.

  • Well, first I’d go to a doctor and have him/her run some blood tests and check my hormones and endocrine system to make sure something wasn’t going sideways with my body. My whole journey into discovering my Hasimotos disease was discovering that I couldn’t handle stress like I used to.

    Wouldn’t it be something if you are feeling this way because your cortisol levels are out of whack, or you are anemic, or you need a vitamin B!2 shot, or your hormones need adjusting? It could be something that simple, and you wouldn’t have to beat yourself up because it would be something that was out of your control.

    Sometimes it’s a simple solution.

    It’s like how I thought for years I had an ulcer — putting up with the pain and discomfort until I had one of my many attacks in front of my mother, who said, “Have you had your gallbladder checked?” My ex husband was there and the next day he drove me to my doctor because he was sick and tired of seeing me in so much pain. Turns out it was my gall bladder and in the condition it was in I would have become sicker and sicker. I had the operation to remove it the next day and within two hours of the operation I felt like a new person. It was the best surgery I ever had. It made me question why I waited so long.

    GO to the doctor, have him run some blood tests. Maybe it isn’t you at all.