How We Get Stuck With Our Own Dream Progress

obstacles get you stuck

 

It’s hard to admit that cause in many circles, I’m known as the “hands-on-get-in-there-and-get-it-done person.” To say that I am stuck and can’t take action feels unnatural and foreign — literally embarrassing.

But that doesn’t mean it isn’t true.

This is how I got here:

  • I know that the cause of my being stuck and living in ‘inaction’ is not due to any kind of fear. Trust me I’m a ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’ kind of person.
  • I know that the cause of my being stuck is not due to a lack of dreaming. I have great ideas for what I want my year to look like, and am truly excited about the possibilities.
  • I know now it’s beyond making lists and setting priorities. It’s much worse.

I have momentarily lost the inspiration for living my dreams in a life of photography.

Have you ever felt disconnected from your dream?

Just so there’s no confusion — I now officially hate this part of the dreaming process.  The real issue runs deep, and it has nothing to do with taking pictures or buying a new camera. What it does have to do with is the negative feelings that come up every time I start thinking about my professional photography dream.

I’m dealing with sadness for all the times I’ve tried working on something I wanted and it didn’t work out. Deep inside of me I’m afraid that I’m going to disappoint myself again -— and that working this through on 8 Women Dream is making me feel like this is just another build-up to nothing and it isn’t going to work either.

Apparently, this is a common feeling that all dreamers must face at some point.

Oddly, negative feelings can also come up when you realize that this time — because of the support system and structure you’ve set in place — your dream really can come true. This brings up another set of emotions masked as sadness. The fairy tale books don’t tell you that when the fairy godmother showed up to make Cinderella’s dream come true Cinderella ran back into the house and hid in a corner crying because her dream opportunity just presented itself and now she really has to go meet her prince.

What do I need to do when dreaming gets like this?

Permission to feel what I feel—- and to be able to say it. Negative emotions come up when you are dreaming and they need to be shared. Either by writing them down, talking with someone, praying — however you can get them out — so the energy can be used to move forward.

Allow yourself to complain, beat the bed with a tennis racket, yell at the sky — then sit down and decide what you are going to do next for your dream. Sometimes it helps if you can listen to a mentor when you are done complaining.

The idea is to complain, then carry on.

One of my favorite mentors is Brian Tracy. In the following video her discuses the 4 steps to overcoming obstacles —

Those 4 steps in a nutshell are:

  1. Define the problem clearly
  2. Determine possible solutions
  3. Decide what solution you try
  4. Take action – because any action is better than no action

I’ll be working on cracking that nut this week – to find out where, when and why this disconnect to taking action on my dreams is happening.

Until next photo,

Rem

Remy’s dream is to have a public showing of her photography work

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  • Catherine Hughes, Editor & Chief

    I enjoyed our conversation and it’s good training for me as I help dreamers where they get stuck, because everyone gets stuck. The best part of a 9-5 corporate job is that they hold you accountable and you want your paycheck, so you deliver. But when we are doing something where the benefits aren’t immediately forthcoming it can be hard to know what step to take or how to motivate ourselves to try something different to move us forward.

    Sometimes life can throw you a curve ball and your dreams get sidelined while you deal with a crisis. I always advise during these times is to put your dream pictures up on a wall where you see them everyday to gently remind you that when you are ready they are waiting.

    We explored many ideas as to why inspiration dies sometimes –

    • ♦ We don’t have a special dream place for our dream, whether it’s a workroom in the back of the house, part of the garage, a corner in our bedroom. There isn’t a special place just for our dream where we can go be with it – where there are inspirational photos and things that make us feel creative.
    • ♦ We don’t schedule time for our dream like an appointment with ourselves. (Every Saturday from 9-1 take at least 25 photographs of anything).
    • ♦ We haven’t played lately. When adults forget to play, creativity goes out the window. Go skip around your backyard where no one will see you. Go hug a tree – anything that will make you feel silly. (Remember that I carried a suitcase around the block while walking my dog. I laughed for three days over that one). Guys get on motorcycles. Borrow someones bike and go for a bike ride (not the motorcycle kind – I don’t want you to hurt yourself). But do something silly that makes you laugh.

    Just don’t eat the cheeeese! lol

    Cath

    • Remy, Photographer & CEO of Cornerstone Creative

      Thank you Cath. Time with you yesterday was important. Although I couldn’t put words to it in the moment, it was bringing tears to my eyes so I know it was important to my soul.

      xoxo Rem

  • Jayne Speich

    Aw, Remy, this sounds SO familiar that it makes me want to cry! Literature is full of things like the dark night of the soul, the falling backward before the great leap forward, the turning inward to prepare to face outward, the pruning of growth to get ready for new little leaves. Did that help? Didn’t think so ;<(( Here's a hug instead. And girl, that is one glorious, gorgeous photograph you posted, maybe just focus on THAT for inspiration. If that's the nothing you got, can I have some?

    • Remy, Photographer & CEO of Cornerstone Creative

      Well, it was inspired by our conversation as well. thanks for the hug! I took that photo about a year ago on a SoCoPhoGro outing – Jack London State Park. I’d be happy to help you in any way I can. It will keep me focused on something else other than my blech. :) Rem

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