Woman’s Head Explodes In Movie Theatre On St Patricks Day

Mexican hat keeps woman's head from exploding

I’m just now crawling out of my suitcase,  burning a few tiles upon re-entry from my dream vacation to Mexico.

It was an outrageously fun girl’s vacation at our time share in Mazatlan. The four of us laughed, reveled and celebrated being together once again. I’m sure, left to our own devices, we would have a great run on the Comedy Tour circuit.

(Anybody out there interested in backing a covey of out-of-the box thinking women to perform? Just saying . . .)

So many of our escapades we have encountered will make great scenes in future screenplays.

It could be when Pancho, the hulk of a man strapped with his bandoleer of shot glasses pouring tequila down our throats and shaking our sombrero laden heads ’til we get dizzy; or the taxi ride in the teensy car hopped up with screaming loud sexually thumping, and grinding music with Jorge the swiveled hipped cabbie, who has a penchant for smacking your behind while boasting to his friends that we are part of his harem.

My girls mean the world to me.

They are the lifeline that gives me the strength and confidence to create and fully realize my dreams.  These same female compadres (albeit Denise-who resides in Utah-but someday WILL return to California and when she does, we will be unstoppable) have written the screenplay “Divine Intervention” with me.

I love, love, love movies. All genres – big and small, black and white, color – silent – subtitled.

Sadly, what’s missing are Goddess bitch of the wilderness, the hunt and wild animals, and fertilityfemale-based movies.

Where the hell are they?

Kathyrn Bigelow is the first female director to receive an Oscar in the eighty-two year history of the Academy Awards.  I mean, come on! Women (especially in the 40+ age group) are movie goers. We want to see smart, mature women in strong roles.

There are so many stories still to be told about women by women.

I don’t really get how the Hollywood machine has missed out on this demographic to make their mega dollars. We’re hoping to change their minds . . .

Before my head explodes.

Right ladies?

The next time you’re in the theater, walk by all those posters in their shiny cases and count how many movies are directed towards women.

What did you come with?

Pathetic I say.

And we’re about to change that.  It is my big dream to see more movies made by and for women.

Are you with me?  Then let’s get our dream on ladies –

Toni

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  • SUZY BENZINGER

    I had to come check out the post that went with this title! Nice looking blog and interesting concept ladies. Good luck with your dreams.

  • This is such a great resource that you are providing and you give it away for free. I love seeing websites that understand the value of providing a quality resource for free. It’s the old what goes around comes around routine. Good luck with your dreams!

    • Toni Schram

      I’m writing this blog to chronicle my journey through
      the murky and often choppy waters of getting a screenplay seen and produced. If I can provide people with some of the do’s and dont’s of breaking into the biz, cool.

      What’s your dream?

  • H

    You both look like great fun and I can’t wait to meet you a week from Friday. Good luck at the Napa Screenwriters. We will be pulling for you!

  • Veronica

    I want to go on vacation with my girlies…..

  • Remy, the photographer

    Hi Toni – great photo! I’m not really a script writer, but every day hands me an opportunity for a movie scene, that is for sure. I guess I get to decide if its a romantic comedy, fast action or horror. Hmm Some days its actually all three at once. I’m with you – Point Break would have been a very different movie from a guys point of view. Cant wait to meet you! Remy

  • Catherine, Site Admin

    I love this picture of you and Laurie. I am so jealous. I cannot tell you when the last time was that I got away. It is so good for the soul.

    You know, Kathryn Bigelow did Point Break and I thought that was one of the sexiest movies about two men, and people were upset that Patrick Swayze was a “bad guy”. That was back in 1991.

    I love Julie and Julia and Nora Ephron. Every time she does a movie, I think, “Thank God, a woman’s viewpoint.” Then there’s Penny Marshall (love Big), Valarie Faris (love Little Miss Sunshine), Sophia Coppola and Mira Nair (Monsoon Wedding – one of my very favorites). There’s more women, but these are the top ones I can think of.

    I have thought this about television for a long time now. Just look at Tina Fey and 30 Rock. Slowly it is changing as females now make up 51.1 % of the US population. That’s a crazy demographic to ignore.

    I am looking forward to hearing your stories as you pitch Divine Intervention.

    Welcome back home.

    Cath